My car has a button for nearly everything. It even has one that says "rear wiper." I'm still too afraid to use that one.
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Sun Apr 07, 2024 6:02 am
by The Meat man
Haha! :D
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Wed Apr 10, 2024 10:02 am
by Doc Dan
Man: Two years ago, my brother ran for Congress.
Friend: What does he do now?
Man: Nothing—he got elected!
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Wed Apr 10, 2024 10:04 am
by Doc Dan
Did you hear about the first restaurant to open on the moon? It didn't do well. It had great food, but no atmosphere.
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Thu Apr 11, 2024 8:48 am
by standy99
We used to have Steve Jobs,Bob Hope and Johnny Cash......
Now we have
no jobs,
no hope and
no cash....
Please,please
don't let Kevin Bacon die!!
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Thu Apr 11, 2024 8:49 am
by standy99
I was on a diabetes awareness site and it asked me if accept cookies…
Is that a trick question?
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2024 10:31 pm
by Doc Dan
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Sat Apr 13, 2024 8:38 am
by standy99
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Mon Apr 15, 2024 11:26 pm
by Doc Dan
A confused man with a map in his hand approached a local man in the city he was visiting.
“What’s the quickest way to get downtown?” he asked.
The local man scratched his head, and said: “Are you walking or driving?”
“I’m driving,” the tourist replied.
“Yup, that’s the quickest way!”
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Mon Apr 15, 2024 11:27 pm
by Doc Dan
Archaeologists exploring a pyramid in Egypt have made a sweet discovery: a mummy wrapped in chocolate and hazelnuts!
► Show Spoiler
They suspect it might be a Pharaoh Rocher.
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Wed Apr 17, 2024 9:35 am
by Doc Dan
This was just too good to pass up posting.
This video pretends to be How It's Made show, but it isn't. It cracks me up.
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Sat Apr 20, 2024 8:55 am
by Doc Dan
Two lifelong friends got together for lunch one day.
“Mike, I’m in a terrible pickle,” the first man stated.
“I’m strapped for cash, my rent is due tomorrow and I haven’t the slightest idea where I’m going to get it from!”
“Well, that’s good to hear,” answered Mike with a smile. “I was afraid you might have an idea that you could borrow it from me!”
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Sat Apr 20, 2024 8:57 am
by Doc Dan
Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband: “I bet you don’t know what day it is today”.
“Of course I do,” he indignantly answered, getting up from the table and going out the door to the office.
At 10am, the doorbell rang. When the woman opened the door, she was handed a box containing a dozen long-stemmed red roses. At 1pm, a foil-wrapped box of her favourite chocolates arrived. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress.
The woman couldn’t wait for her husband to come home. When he did, she exclaimed: “First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress! I’ve never had a more wonderful day for a dental cleaning in my life!”
Re: Family friendly jokes
Posted: Wed Apr 24, 2024 12:25 am
by Doc Dan
A couple of cannibals are sitting around, and one says:
“I don’t like my brother-in-law very much.”